Follow Your Arrow

Okay, so things are about to get a little soap box-y right now. But that's what blogs are for sometimes, right? Also, I tend to get frustrated with myself for not having an opinion on things....so this is me having an opinion. 

Watch this video, then read.

So, I really like this song. It's a little weird, and I certainly don't condone some of the things that it talks about, (smoking joints, girl-on-girl kissing, etc.) but I just love what it's getting at. Essentially, you're always going to be wrong. You're never going to please everyone. So quit trying to make society happy, and just make yourself happy. People have this terrible habit of picking at other people's lives and telling them everything they are doing wrong, and what they should be doing instead. People also have a terrible habit of listening to the opinions of everyone else, and trying to live a life that will make society happy. Well, the truth is, that's impossible. You are never going to live a life that makes all of society happy; so why make yourself miserable trying?

I have seen lots of blogs and articles lately about this very thing: telling people what they should be doing with their lives right now. For example: I've seen lots of people talking about how getting married at a young age is the absolute worst plan - how those marriages are doomed to failure and people use marrying young as a cop-out to avoid finding their own place in the world blah, blah, blah. I have also seen lots of counters to this point of view - how marriage is the greatest thing that has every happened to them, and they are so glad to be with someone every day who loves them  unconditionally, and people who don't have that are just sad and bitter blah, blah, blah. Both of these bother me. If you find the person you love when you are 19 and decide to marry them - great! If you decide you want to focus on other things for a while before settling down - also great! I think people on both sides of this argument need to be a little more sensitive. Telling people who married young that they ruined their lives and are bound to get divorced is - obviously - incredibly rude. And untrue. And people can't really go back in time and change those decisions even if they wanted to. So that's not fine. But going on about how wonderful marriage is, and how nice it is to have someone who loves you and takes care of you all the time - thus making that the correct life decision - is also a little insensitive. I don't want to make a blanket statement saying that everyone wants to get married eventually, but I'm sure that a lot of those people who are focusing on finding their place in the world right now would not complain if someone showed up who wanted to love them forever unconditionally. But, just like married people can't time travel, single people can't decide to get married one day and just have that happen. So let's just let people make their own decisions based on what works best for them, and stop fighting about which way is right. Mmmmk?

The marriage thing is just one example, but it's definitely not the only one. I'm in an interesting place in my life right now where, depending on who you ask, there's lots of different things that I "should" be doing. Getting a graduate degree, getting married, having babies, going on a mission, travelling, working my way up the corporate ladder, etc., etc., etc. Obviously, I can't do all of these things at the same time so, to one part of society or another, I'm always going to be wrong. This can be really frustrating. But I have realized that it just doesn't matter. I'm going to do what makes me happy, and not worry about whether or not the rest of the world approves. Maybe it's selfish, but I don't think the point of my life should be to please everyone else. And yes, if someday I get married and have children, then I will adjust my priorities to make decisions for my life that will make my whole family happy - not just me. But for now, I'm following my own arrow and living my life for me.